Cody’s One Smelly Stinky Man

Last night, Mike and I were standing on the front porch when our neighbors got home. Our neighbors have two preteen girls. We weren’t really paying attention to them until we overheard one of the girls say ‘I call the shower first!’ Mike and I just looked at each other and said ‘gee, wouldn’t it be nice if that was a daily argument in our house?’

Instead, we get ‘Why can’t Evan go first?’ and ‘But I took a bath last week!’ and ‘Do I really have to wash all of my hair?’

We tried pointing out that girls like clean boys, but he pointed out that he has a girlfriend and she doesn’t seem to mind. Of course, ‘girlfriend’ right now doesn’t mean more than ‘her group of girl friends and my group of boy friends stand next to each other outside school in the mornings and sit at the same table at lunch and at recess I’ll chase her around the playground.’ At least this one isn’t a love note writing one, like a previous ‘girlfriend’.

Cody has started to sweat. Not little boy sweat- but stinky man sweat. He doesn’t sweat all the time, usually just when he’s playing, but the fact is- he’s growing up. He pointed out that he has toe hair (ew) and spent an hour plucking it out, because hairy feet are gross (hey, at least we agree on something). I asked him if he had hair anywhere else, thinking he’d tell me that he has pit hair (because while hairy feet are gross, hairy pits are cool), and he points to his chest and says ‘yes. Because I’m a MAN.’


Yesterday, he had a birthday party to go to. He had taken a bath the night before, but since the party wasn’t until 4pm, he was kinda sweaty and smelly. Rather than shove him in the shower (which wouldn’t work, because he’d turn it on, sit on the side of the tub, and pray that ‘clean’ would just suddenly appear on his body), we had him change the smelly stuff and then we brought out the deodorant.

Gramma and I had to tackle him to the ground to get it on him.

To his credit, it was cold. I bought him a stick, and he made sure to tell me that he put it on this morning. Mike thinks that Cody can just use his deodorant, but I’m thinking a- ew, that’s gross and b- it’s not that expensive so why not get him his own stick and c- what self respecting mother lets a 9 year old boy wear Axe deodorant? I got him Degree, because at least they don’t advertise ‘getting girls’. He’s not quite ready for that yet. With three boys, we have plenty of years for this.


About fallyn96

mother. queen of the house. likes sparkly stuff because sparkly stuff is boy repellent. especially if it's pink sparkly stuff. View all posts by fallyn96

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